Screw Cancer
Cancer.
Shit.
After recovering for over two weeks from a Hysterectomy, the last thing I expected my doctor to call me with was cancer.
Total shock.
Dry mouth.
Mind Racing.
My health history isn’t exactly stellar. I had stage 4 follicular Thyroid Cancer at age 4 with a recurrence at age 24. So when it comes to cancer, I know the score. But when I was 24, there was no Buggies or Pixie to worry about. There was a (scared out of his wits) new hubby but there were no babies that I wanted to watch grow. There was no child’s future begging me to be there for their first dance, first crush, first kiss, and first heartache. There was no child to feed and care for until they hopefully get married and have children of their own so I can do what every mother dreams of…laugh behind my daughter’s back as her child puts her through the same things I went through.
But then the C-word hit again. And more than being frightened about my own health and treatment, I was more concerned about the future. I just wanted to know I would get past this so I could live a long life and be in the front row to watch my girls grow up.
Of course the type of cancer I have is one of the most rare types of cancer ever reported because I’m special like that and I like to keep my doctor’s on their toes. And apparently, I have creative cancer cells. Whenever I meet a new oncologist/radiologist/internist, I advise them to think of the most bizarre diagnosis they can and that is probably what I have.
After a terrifying week researching the hell out of Endometrial Stromal Sarcoma, I had a full CT and the results showed the cancer had not spread. It was completely contained within the uterus with some vascular invasion that we will monitor. Of course, the recurrence rate on this type of cancer is extremely high so I’ll be under observation for the next two years.
I keep wondering why. Haven’t I had enough cancer in my life? Enough health issues? I follow the rules…eat healthy, exercise, stay hydrated. Yet for some damn reason, cancer likes my body. And there really is only one answer to all of this. It is the only one that makes sense to me and that I keep coming back to.
I am a FIGHTER.
I am STRONG.
Some people couldn’t handle something like this. One of my closest girlfriends has a friend who passed away from stage 4 colon cancer. I never had the opportunity to meet her but she was a FIGHTER until the very end. Her Facebook is still flooded with messages about her warm caring heart, strong fight and she must have had great thighs cause all of her friends talk about them. She came up with a little saying that I’m loving.
KATNR:
Kicking Ass
Taking Names
Repeat.
I WILL be there to watch my girls grow up.
I WILL grow old with the hubby.
I WILL live a long, full life no matter how many times cancer tries to get me.
You messed with the wrong woman, cancer.
I WILL ALWAYS BEAT YOU.
I WILL ALWAYS WIN.
Comments
- Rocketdyne, SSFL and NBC - […] home from Florida and had to have an emergency hysterectomy. You can read more about this post here. The…
Nikki
November 15, 2014
Still haven’t met you, so bordering on stalker status now, BUT- you are in my family’s thoughts and prayers. So sorry you have to endure all of this! Ryan is a lucky guy to have married such a kick ass girl!
Cathy Gesell
November 15, 2014
Yes, you will!!! And we’ll be with you every step of the way!
Sue
December 4, 2014
Hi, I was also diagnosed with endometrial stromal sarcoma, following a hysterectomy. My cancer sounds at the same stage as yours, contained in the uterus, but with vascular invasion.
You are right, we have to be strong in this fight, show cancer who’s boss!
I have 2 lovely girls who I want to see grow up.
Jessica
December 10, 2014
Hi Sue!
I am so sorry to hear this…may I ask how old you are? Did they find any link genetically?